Rain Showers

I really want it to rain tonight. Haha but it probably won't.

Rain showers

I go dancing and singing in the street

When it rains

Twirling and twirling around again

When it rains

I sing my heart and soul out

When it rains

Singing of the birds and flowers

When it rains

Dreaming of love lost

When it rains

Relishing in the new beginning

When it rains

I go dancing and spinning about

When it rains

Jumping and leaping in delight

When it rains

Turning around and around

When it rains

Seeing the world as it is

When it rains

I join in the cleansing of the earth

When it rains

Purging away the rot and muck

When it rains

Adding another layer to the riddle

When it rains

Drinking up the tears from heaven

When it rains

I love the smell of the air

When it rains

Love hearing my potential

When it rains

Some may say it is dark and dreary

When it rains

But really it is light and refreshing 

When it rains

March 19, 2009

Perfect Role

I wrote this so long ago. But I've been feeling a bit lost lately. Just confused as to who I am. And I recalled this poem. I don't know if this gave me complete clarity but I think it helps. I may not know what role I am playing right now but at least I know this didn't just come out of nowhere. I like being a theatre person but who am I behind all the different characters?

Perfect Role

Everyone thinks I’m at the top of the world

Not so

I’m an actor

Full of rehearsed scenes and practiced movements.

Sure I can be spontaneous, adding my own touch to an act

But I feel I can’t remove this costume

It’s weighing me down and becoming part of me.

I am becoming more and more like the character I am playing

But I play multiple characters

Who am I?

Am I a mixture of fictitious people?

Do I even have an original personality?

This stage make-up is covering my true beauty

And all these props seem so real.

I guess I have heard so many songs, read so many books,

Seen so many plays and movies

I seem to think my life should be a Broadway musical

But I keep changing the main character

The audience is getting confused.

How to end this episode of my life?

Should I conclude with a dramatic cliffhanger,

A humbling lesson for all ages,

A romantic happily ever after

Or a perfectly normal day?

What will attract more spectators?

What will make the actors keep performing?

Should I just forget everyone and tell it how it is?

Not care who’s watching or listening

And just make up my own character

Someone who is very similar to myself

Who has a knack for putting herself in other people’s shoes

A girl who might be just like you,

An amateur actor searching for the perfect role.

February 26, 2009

True Magic

Magic holds a special place in my heart. I see it as a part of everything. I love the magic of witches and wands but also smiles and kindness. I think God made magic. I really believe that magic is in the wind and the rain. How can it not be? I am in awe of everything this world holds. I feel God's spirit in most everything I do and I can't think of a better word to describe that spirit than magical. Not the magic of make believe but the magic of something wonderfully unexplained.  

True Magic

Magic is traditionally the art

Of something you can’t see

But feel in your heart

It’s more than illusions

And deceptions to lead

The audience to new conclusions

We can’t understand it absolutely

No matter how hard you study

Or watch astutely

The true magic of this universe

Is in the power of God

Not slight of hands you rehearse

God isn’t a magician let’s be clear

He has true power and presence

An awe that we should revere

His spirit upon this earth

Is the magic that has

Surrounded me since birth

It’s the warmth from the star

That gives us life and light

From a distance unbelievably far

The magic of a loving touch

The simple human contact

That can change everything so much

Magic is in the trees

As the wind blows

I see what the bird sees

A simple smile has it

Even from a stranger

You have to admit

Magic means everything to me

It’s how the world goes round

It is life’s ultimate key

True magic happens when I write

I feel the power

As He gives me sight

To see

The true magic

In me

July 14, 2015

Story of Mr. Wrong

So I looked back the other day and realized I have ended up crushing on all the wrong guys in the past 6 months and after consoling myself I found the humor.

Story of Mr. Wrong

Once upon a time there was a lady

With hair neapolitan and wavy

She had the worst of luck

In picking men she sorta sucked

None returned her affection

They didn’t see her perfection

All she did was crush on all the wrong men

Seriously it was probably a sin

There was the preme boy

Practically still a minor with toys

But his smile was adorable

The age difference—deplorable

I wasn’t the next guy’s type at all

Talking to him was like hitting a wall

I should have seen it earlier on

But he was way more interested in John

After that was the perfect guy

Floppy hair and a twinkle in his eye

I didn’t notice the signs

But he always said the right lines

Taken from the script in his hand

He was an actor—the best in the land

There are usually rules to forbid

Crushes at work unless you keep them off the grid

But this coworker would just flirt and smile

So there wasn’t an HR report to even file

I waited two years for the next boy

Now he’s back and plays with me like a toy

He is awkward and unsure

His thoughts still missionary and pure

He doesn’t know how to respond to a text

So I moved on to the next

I liked this one’s bossiness

It matched well with my sauciness

But he was my manager at work

And my job doesn’t have those kinds of perks

The last man is the worst crush of my life

He happens to have a wife

July 11, 2015

Time Lapse

Sometimes viewing your life as a movie is naive but then occasionally it's the only way everything makes sense. I was downhearted, sad and confused and I even wondered if I was just a supporting character. What if it wasn't my movie?

As I was wallowing as we all tend to do I realized something magnificent. I have been going through the motions for months and nothing has changed. I am in the time lapse sequence. Months go by in seconds on the screen, but in life those are real months.; Some of the hardest because everyday is the same. I'm stuck in a rut right now. And I don't know what to do.

Then I really thought about those time sequences--THEY DON'T LAST FOREVER--they end. And once they do things change. Even the smallest change makes room for more change.

I don't know where I am in the course of my movie. I have no idea what will happen, who will walk into my life and who will walk out.

But all I have to do right now is weather through this time. A new scene will come and everything will change. As I choose to stand strong I will look for the change.

July 5,2015